AnchorMommy

Suckers suck

December 3, 2009 by Shannon

I don’t have anything against suckers, per se. They are certainly tasty. I have fond childhood memories of going through the bank drive-thru with my mom, because the tellers gave us Dum-Dums.

Now that I’m the mom? I think suckers suck. They should be called “stickers” because of all the stuff they stick to. A kid’s hands, face, clothes, hair…and that’s just the minimal damage. There’s also lampshades, rugs, carseats, pets…the possibilities are endless.

And if I may, I’d like to offer an observation about kids with suckers in shopping carts. If your child is somewhere around the 30 pound mark, as mine is, I’m sure you often heave him out of the shopping cart seat while looking down and praying that his feet will come out of the leg holes without popping off a shoe in the middle of the freezing cold parking lot. At least that’s what I was doing the other day, not realizing that my boy was looking down too. At the same time, his arms were going up, allowing the sticky little sucker from my husband’s lovely office building receptionist to wind itself right into my little boy’s moppy crop of hair.

And that is when I learned something new: suckers are second only to gum in the way they grab on to human hair and refuse to let go.

So if you ever happen to heave a sucker-holding child out of a shopping cart, don’t worry about his or her feet. Keep your eyes on that damn sucker.

Who needs hair product when your hair is sucker-styled?

Remember, it's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt.