January 10, 2011 by Shannon
If I could take a picture of myself right now and publish it along with this post, it would scare your socks off. I look like a walking zombie. And this is after I showered and got all made up. Yep, it’s one of those days where makeup doesn’t even help.
The universe is dealing out some paybacks after I casually mentioned to another mom about one great night of sleep Ella had over the weekend. She only woke up once! At five am! It was glorious.
And then…last night happened.
First, Kellan woke up saying he was scared of the dark. (He has a really bright nightlight in his room, but apparently that didn’t help.) That was at 1 am.
Then Ella woke at 2 am. In my already desperately tired state, I nursed her to get her back to sleep quickly and quietly.
At 4 am, another wakeup call from Ella. This time, for some reason, I was determined NOT to nurse her back to sleep. After much screaming and many soothing attempts, she finally put herself back to sleep around 5 am.
Naturally, the sound of my alarm came way too soon after that. So I’m super exhausted and I have to make a big grocery run with both kids this afternoon. I’m depressed just thinking about how tired that will make me. (I just resorted to a little chocolate therapy. Six mini peanut butter cups later, I just feel sugared up and tired. Bleh.)
I know that if I can just sleep train Ella to stop waking so many times – if I can just fight the urge to take the path of least resistance and nurse her back to sleep every time – I’ll thank myself later. It’s just so hard to do when I’m already so very sleep deprived.
But I just have to complain a little bit here: how in the hell do some moms get their babies to sleep through the night by six months? I mean, really. All the books tell me sleeping through the night means 5 or 6 hours straight. But then I talk to other moms – actual people – who tell me that their kids sleep from 7:30 pm to 7 am. What?!?!? Did they accomplish this feat through sleep training? Or do the babies just do this on their own? Are these formula-fed kids we’re talking about?
I don’t know. I guess I just need to stay strong and make sure nursing doesn’t become my preferred back-to-sleep method. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll end up with one of those miracle babies.
Or maybe my eyeballs will fall out from exhaustion. Only time will tell.