AnchorMommy

Maybe we’ll name her Portabella

May 13, 2010 by Shannon

Portabella. How’s that sound for a baby girl name? It’s like two names in one, really. We could call her Porta for short, or just Bella. I can just picture it now…“Oh Portabella, who’s my chubby little mushroom?”

I jest, of course. I could never name my baby girl after large fungi. But lately, when people ask me if I have a name picked out, I reply, “No, but I’ve picked out paint colors.” And I’m serious. It’s been way easier to decide on our new wall colors – like Pale Portabella, Beach Bum and Sandcastle – than it is to choose a name for the little one who’s due to arrive in 11 weeks.

When it comes to naming a kid, there’s a lot to think about. I want something unique, yet classic. And as for unique names, there is a very fine line between different and just plain weird. Old names are coming back in style, but some of them just sound too matronly. And some of the classic names are just too…well…normal.

I like Irish names since I’m of Irish heritage. I named my son Kellan. And I’ve always liked my own name (aside from a brief period where I wished it was spelled differently, like Shannyn – not sure what was up with that). But have you ever looked at a list of Irish baby girl names? There’s Molly and Maggie – not bad. Then there’s Sinead and Siobhan – weirder, but still kinda mainstream thanks to that female singer and one of the contestants on American Idol. And then, you come across the full-on Gaelic names. Names like Faoiltiama, which means “wolf lady.” Grrrrrrr. And then there’s Aghaveagh, which means, “from the field of the old tree.” Soooo…..Gaelic girl names aren’t looking too appealing at this point.

Lists of celebrity names? Can’t even go there. Nope, Saffron or Fifi will not cut it. (Bob Geldof named his girl Fifi. Really? Really, Bob? After all the worldly good you’ve done, you couldn’t at least give your daughter a name with a little more worldly appeal? At least something that doesn’t make people think of a fluffy poodle?)

I don’t know what we’re going to do. Sometimes I wonder if Portabella isn’t such a bad idea after all.

Note: During my baby name research I have discovered the meaning of the name Enzo, which is the name of our enormous Bernese Mountain Dog/Border Collie mix. It means “rules his household,” which explains two things perfectly. One, Enzo refuses my repeated and often shouted commands to stay the *^%# out of the kitchen at dinner time. Two, Enzo will not stay on his dog bed to dry out after a soaking spring rain, choosing instead to wait until I’m distracted and then slink off to plunk his filthy, wet self in the middle of the house. To say Enzo rules his household is an understatement. Perhaps he’s an example of why it’s wise to pay attention to the meaning of a name before you bestow it? Damn dog.