AnchorMommy

An unwanted gift under the tree

December 10, 2009 by Shannon

I have a bulimic cat. Some people laugh at this, but others — who have known a bulimic cat or two in their lives — know exactly what I’m talking about. I also once had a cat with AIDS, but that’s an entirely different story.

This bulimic cat of mine has a propensity to leave little “gifts” around the house. And wouldn’t you know it — she’s already left two under the Christmas tree. Gee thanks, Mia.

Around here, we call it the herka herka. That’s the sound she makes as she’s retching something up. Sometimes — as was the case with the Christmas “gifts” — the herka herka goes unnoticed for a while because we’re not around to hear it. But there is one time that the herka herka strikes fear into my heart. It’s when the herka herka awakens us at night, because Mia is usually at the foot of our bed when the wretching begins. Cat puke is disgusting, but it’s most disgusting when it soaks through the bedding and wets your feet. You can take my word on that.

In fact, just last week we awoke to the sound of “herka herka herka…” coming from the foot of the bed. Michael bolted upright. (Which is highly unusual. He has an uncanny ability to sleep through darn near anything, including the sound of a wailing child. I bet if a bulldozer were to roll down our street at 3 a.m., Michael would have no idea anything happened the following morning.) I must have been exhausted, because I didn’t bolt upright until I realized Michael had leaped out of bed. He shoved the cat off the bed. Then he spooked her into the bathroom and off the bedroom carpet. I made a leap for backyard door, opened it, and yelled “Here! Here! Mia!” Michael scooped her up and tossed her out just as she spilled her guts everywhere. Phew. Nothing like a little 3 a.m. frantic cat wrangling to get your blood pumping.

We won that battle. Unfortunately, Mia is still winning The Great Herka Herka War.